How to get over a breakup - 12 tips on how to move on when a relationship ends (2023)

SHeartbreak is something that many of us go through at some point in our lives, making us anxious about how to overcome a breakup.

As much as we wish to live happily ever after with our partner, the reality is that some relationships will come to an end. Actually theNumber of divorces in England and WalesIncreased by almost 10 percent in 2021 compared to 2020.

Overcoming a breakup is never easy. It can be especially hard when you still love your ex and it's painful to think about life without them. If you have recently suffered heartbreak, you may be wondering how long it will be before you move on to the next chapter of your life.

While there is no magical cure for a broken heart, there are practical things you can do to protect your physical and mental health.i have a group, an accredited relationship coach andChristian Maxion, an international relationship and dating coach offers the following 12 tips.

1. Interrupt communication

Nina says cutting ties with an ex is an important first step. "It's important to protect yourself and your mental health - even if it's just for the first few weeks. This will help you go through the healing process faster.”

If you are co-parents, Nina advises against trying to control the relationship between your ex-partner and the child. “It is not your responsibility to protect the relationship between your ex and your child. This is up to them, so there is no need to try and control this. Every time you open the channel of communication, the wound opens and the pain becomes real again.”

2. Spend time with family and friends

After a breakup, you may feel more vulnerable than usual and probably not quite yourself. The best people during this time are those who know you best and love you unconditionally. Make plans to see your family and friends, especially around times you would normally be at home with your ex, such as Saturday nights or Sunday afternoons.

3. Prioritize yourself

When you were in a relationship, you may have compromised your own needs. A toxic relationship may have made you feel guilty about doing things for yourself or isolated you from loved ones.

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So use your newfound single status as an opportunity to put yourself first. "Create your happy list with at least 10 things that make you naturally happy," says Christiana. “Like bubble baths, a good book or podcast, your favorite sport or socializing. Make that list visible, whether it's on the back of your front door or on your phone screen, and promise to do at least one or two of these things every day.”

4. Take a break from social media

While social media has many positive aspects, it can be a source of anxiety and pain when you're going through a breakup. It's not helpful to know what your ex is up to at any time of the day or to be obsessed with who they spend their time with.

Do not follow or mute their account for the foreseeable future, or take a complete break from social media as you navigate this vulnerable time. This is even more important if they quickly moved on with someone else. While you may be curious, you will only cause yourself more pain.

5. Keep fit

The NHS recommends that you do 150 minutes of aerobics a week, which can be anything from a run in the park to a spin class at the gym. Getting your heart pumping releases endorphins, the feel-good chemicals that lift your spirits.Exercise can also boost your self-esteem, give you energy and help you sleep better.

Sports like boxing provide you with a safe place to vent your anger and will help you do soget fitter and strongerincluded. Even a dance or yoga class can get your heart rate up and give you a new skill to learn while you're at it.

The other benefit of joining a sports club or regular fitness class is the sense of community it can bring you, a real solace at a potentially lonely time.

6. Book a trip

Having something to look forward to during a difficult time can make a world of difference to your mental health. So talk to a few friends or family members and organize a long-distance trip or just a weekend away together.

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A spa retreat might be just what you need after a stressful divorce, or a trip to an exotic or adventurous location might help you gain a new perspective. Dine at great restaurants, book a massage and indulge in shopping therapy while travelling. It's time to spoil yourself.

Nobody to take away? Just take a trip on your own or keep drivinga vacation for solo travellers.

7. Do something for others

When we volunteer our time to help other people, we can take our minds off our own concerns, including overcoming a breakup. In addition to benefiting othersKindness can reduce stressand improve our emotional well-being. Volunteering can help you approach difficult situations with more empathy, which can come in handy when you're angry with your ex.

You could volunteer at a charity store once a week, find a local benevolent service for the elderly, or even walk a neighbor's dog. It's all about those little gestures of kindness.

8. Cook in batches and eat well

The Mental Health CharityGeistsays that nutritious food is an essential part of our well-being, improving our mood and helping us think more clearly. So gather a few of your favorite recipes, write a grocery list, and spend an afternoon cooking.

Put your meals in the fridge and freezer so you always have a nutritious home-cooked meal on hand. This will also keep you from ordering a takeout every time you're feeling down or having a bad day.

9. Talk to a therapist

The end of a relationship can leave unanswered questions and open wounds that can take time to heal. A professional therapist will help you resolve some of these issues and allow you to speak freely and confidentially without worrying about overwhelming a family member or friend.

Therapy appointments can be face-to-face or even online or via SMS if you prefer. organizations such asbetter helpcan help you find the right professional for your unique needs.

10. Read before bed

You may find that your worries surface just before bed. This can prevent you from falling asleep.

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In a difficult time, it can be beneficial to really switch off. Turn off all technology, stay away from social media, and sink into a good book. Reading has the power to transport our thoughts to another place and give us a temporary respite.

11. Think about what you really want in a partner

Instead of thinking about what went wrong with your ex, make a list of what you want in a future partner. "As we consider the 'five worlds' of the spiritual, physical, emotional, intellectual and financial worlds, ask yourself what traits, qualities and values ​​do you want in a partner in each of these worlds," says Christiana.

“Narrow these down to your top 10 must-haves and top 5 non-negotiables. Keep this list in your phone, wallet, or any other place in your home. You can even turn it into a vision board with photos and make it your phone's background or desktop screen.”

12. Sign up for a dating site

When you feel ready to move on, sign up for aDating-Site oder Appcan be a great way to meet new people. The first step is to find a dating site that will connect you with like-minded people.

For people in their forties, fifties and sixties,telegraph datingis the ideal service. Its members include single parents, the divorced, and those seeking someone mature and successful.

If you haven't dated in a long time and are nervous, mention it in your profile. Chances are you will find someone who is just like you.

And do not forget:

be patient

There is no quick fix for heartbreak, so give yourself time to recover. At the end of a relationship, you may feel a certain amount of sadness as you mourn the loss of the person and the circumstances. As with grief, time is a great healer.

Getting over a marriage breakup if you still love her

"Divorces are painful, messy, and often drawn out, with a lot more bureaucratic stress alongside the emotional toll," says Christiana. "I would advise seeking professional help that will allow you to build a toolbox of successful solutions to get through this period."

Surround yourself with a strong support system to help you with your emotional and mental health needs, as well as practical things. "Divorce and breakups are real eye openers to who your real cheerleaders and friends are. Your physical and emotional well-being is a key priority here and not rushing into a new relationship, even as retaliation or setback.”

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Getting over a breakup you caused

"Usually whoever initiated the breakup is the one who gets over it quicker because they've already processed the end of the relationship long before the other person, for whom it might have been a complete surprise," he tells Christa.

Despite this, you may feel responsible and guilty for your ex for leaving them in pain. While it may be tempting to keep communications open, it's best for both parties to minimize this as much as possible. Give the other person space without moving on.

frequently asked Questions

How long does it take to process a breakup?

How long is a piece of string? The time it takes varies from person to person and depends on the length of the relationship and the depth of the emotional bond.

What not to do after a breakup?

Don't jump into another relationship until you're properly healed. Starting a new relationship too soon can be harmful to both you and your new partner as you will carry behavioral patterns from the previous relationship. Take time to recover even if you were the one who ended it.

If you are single and interested in meeting like minded people, jointelegraph dating. With more than 220,000 singles, Telegraph Dating is the best place to find romance.

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